SHARON MURPHY | Psychotherapist

There are times when parents have to face issues concerning their children. However, when the parents’ relationship is not working as a functional parental team, then help might be required to have difficult conversations and to work through difficult issues involving the children.

 

Longitudinal research now exists, which provides information on minimising the impact of divorce and separation on children. Veiled acrimony between parents can be devastating for children's emotional development. Parents' ability to remain emotionally available to children rather than becoming overwhelmed by stress, anger and grief is the other major factor in childhood adjustment to divorce. When a therapist works with separated or divorced parents, the therapist can assist:

 

• Parents to re-establish a non-toxic space between the parents in which the children can move between and grow.

• Parents to discuss the living arrangements for the children.

• Parents to make Parenting Plans and Orders work.

• Parents to discuss different parenting approaches to issues such as bed times, and electronic media, when different parenting styles are creating issues.

• Parents to discuss the children’s schooling, emotional or social issues, or other issues.

• Parents to move past the pain of the separation and understand the importance of being respectful when talking about the other parent and his/her family or new partner.